Motherhood

Motherhood.
Is it not the biggest roller coaster ride?
The most thrilling, exciting, scary and emotionally draining ride 
we have ever been on?
Of course, I would not trade it for the world,
even on the days when I wonder how in the world I will make it 
to the end of the day’s ride.
But I am learning, every day.
I know it will be a forever learning process.
But I am learning,
that without the strength, hope and grace I find In Jesus,
this ride will make my head spin.
Joy, from Grace Full Momma spoke truth into my heart today;
“It isn’t so that we can be a great mom,
 it isn’t so that we can raise great kids, 
it isn’t even so that we can have strong, happy families.  
These things are all good, 
but the real reason we learn and study and grow in these areas [motherhood] is so that 
we can know Christ and display His Gospel in our lives for HIS glory.”

Truth that is sometimes hard to swallow.
I want to be a great mom and have great kids and have a strong, happy family!
The truth is that I do.
I just tag on perfection to those areas,
standards that only make me feel like a failure.
I have not been focusing on what my heart really desires,
for my kids and my family to be rooted in the hope, joy and grace that Jesus gives.
This is the desire of my heart.
And I am learning,
that if I want this for my family, if I really want it,
it must start with me.
I need to know Christ.  I need to display His Gospel in my life.
But I can not do that if I am not abiding in Him, every day.
I must be in prayer, in His Word, in His presence.
And so I recommit, like I must do every morning,
I recommit my self to Jesus,
asking for forgiveness, grace, strength and courage
to get on the roller coaster today with joy and anticipation
for the climbs and the falls and the curves.
Here we go!

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